So, I woke up just a few minutes ago, after spending much of last night scanning and typing up the third letter from Peter Popoff — yeah, that’s right. I got another one, even though I just got one on the 17th.

This one’s even funnier.

Anyway — there was a thing in my inbox about something I totally forgot about. It has to do with this IM from chat that I posted on the old gremlin.net messageboard. It turns up as the #1 thing on google when you do a search on ‘coloradomodeling’.

People will believe you if you tell them you’re not a real person.

Posted by Hunter on Sunday 05 December 2004 at 08.42.45 ZuluTime:

Some people are just too retarded. Like coloradomodeling, for example….

coloradomodeling: (private) To hunter_the_crazychick hey Hunter !
hunter_the_crazychick: (private to coloradomodeling) Um, hello.
coloradomodeling: (private) To hunter_the_crazychick um hi
coloradomodeling: (private) To hunter_the_crazychick always wondered if you were a real person
hunter_the_crazychick: (private to coloradomodeling) No, I’m not.
coloradomodeling: (private) To hunter_the_crazychick well then I won’t waste any more time I guess
hunter_the_crazychick: (private to coloradomodeling) Good. Don’t PM me.
coloradomodeling: (private) To hunter_the_crazychick too bad tho

So, anyway, I woke up to this…likely insulting EMail. I’m not sure. I only half read it before going off to see if it was some sort of new spam creation.

Subject: re: real people on Yahoo
From: Scott Murrish [coloradomodeling@yahoo.com]

I did a search recently on ColoradoModeling and found a message you had posted somewhere last year regarding our Yahoo chat.

You know exactly where it was, because what you clicked on said ‘gremlin.net: your number one source for whatever in hell we’ve got here’. Coloradomodeling is nowhere in the link, or in the description on yahoo.com. If you used Google, it came up first with the same link, and your screenname (private) to hunter_the_crazychick, asking me if I’m a real person.

Since you might not search thru the Yahoo directory looking for ladies like I do (looking for potential models) you might not know that 90% of the female profiles on Yahoo are bogus – fake identities using stolen photos to lure foolish men to their bogus websites and webcams and such.

Someone sounds a little like zeta here. 90% of females fake, or 90% just don’t respond, or buy it, when someone on yahoo claiming to be…whatever the hell it is you claim to be…starts pestering them. That photographer-will-turn-you-into-a-model thing is years older. I ran into one myself, although he also claimed to be a clothing designer.

That isn’t you, is it?

Of course, what do I know. I’m just a fake dumb girl. A yahoo chat infant, having only been there for five or so years.

You may or may not be familiar with BOTS (they also appear in the chat rooms with inane comments). It is quite possible on Yahoo to have a chat with a non-person – a programmed script, again designed to get someone to click on a link to website. I get PMs from these non-people all the time.

Yeah, I’m just totally unfamiliar with the concept of bots. I’m just a widdle n00b, all alone in a world full of bots, thinking that the people in Religion:1 might actually be something like ‘human’.

Real people trawl the directories for females they can talk up into being models.

Real persons on Yahoo, at least of the female gender, are vastly out numbered by phonies.

You forgot to count the number of females who don’t mark themselves as females, or mark themselves as males to get away from people like you.

My question to you about being a real person is not at all absurd, considering these circumstances. It only takes a few seconds to ask a question and get an explanation but, I guess it’s just easier to assume everyone else is an idiot.

I don’t assume everyone else is an idiot. I assume people who IM me with stupid questions like ‘are you a real person’ are idiots for a couple of reasons….

“Are you a real person,” doesn’t seem to ask anywhere near half of what you claim it asks. If I were an unsophisticated bot — which seems to be all you know — I would’ve either already tried to initiate an IM with you, or I wouldn’t have been chatting in the room. An unsophisticated bot never would’ve responded.

A slightly more sophisticated bot might’ve responded, if the person weilding it knew what they were doing. I know a couple people who know just that, and one person who’s actually built a bot that others can use to make ‘chatters’ in this category. So, there you are, assuming I’m an idiot again, just like you must’ve when you IMed me.

The problem here isn’t me. It’s you. You got yourself caught on a nasty little hook that you could’ve easily avoided, had you bothered to investigate my profile further. My profile hasn’t been altered much in the past year or so — I still have links to the gremlin.net messageboard, and to my own website.

I suppose those things, while full of information, don’t actually tell you whether or not I’m a ‘man’ or otherwise ‘fake female’. If I were — neither would I, dummy. “Are you actually who you say you are,” phrased however you like, to a person in yahoo chat who isn’t actually who they say they are isn’t going to get you a “I’m a big phony!”

It’s going to get you a very serious “Yes, I’m actually Charlize Theron.”

That, of course, is assuming they’re using that person’s picture. But hey, it’s a good example, isn’t it?

Oh, and, no — I don’t actually assume everyone else is an idiot. You just give a nasty first impression. A nasty second impression, too.

Scott
ColoradoModeling.com

Always wondered if you were a real idiot….

I guess we both know the answers to our questions now, don’t we?

In case anyone’s curious, this is the ‘Colorado Modeling’ website.
This is also coloradomodeling.com.

You get a lot of stuff like that when you do searches….

Anyway, I’ve got a religious fanatic to make fun of, and Lord of the Rings to read.

And, I suppose, bots to chat with.

First, though, I should note that my comment above about uber-geek.com should in no way be construed as my claiming any sort of ownership, creatorship [is that a word], or any other-ship [I know that’s not a word] over the website or the bot. I didn’t do it. Ondoher, one of the few chatters I’ve met in person, did. I just watched a large part of the creative process [what happened in AvC], and then watched a whole bunch of people fall for what was obviously [to me] a bot.

Of course, I’d been watching such things for a while, anyway. Ondo’s bot was just better at being NotSoObviouslyABot than most of the other bots I’d encountered up to that point — IM Pornspam bots, the new YahooSingles Spam bots [they just IM random people with something about being a match], fundie posting bots, and the more malicious/disruptive scroll and jitterbots.

Just thought I should get that out there, in case there was any sort of misunderstanding. There’s enough near-almost-maybe-zetaishness in this post already.