For the last week or so, I’ve been seeing ads for the local news about “The Two Sides of Eddie.” The ads were deliberately vague, only revealing this guy’s name — Eddie — and that he gave a lot to children, and also owned a bunch of pornography…stores, and stuff.

It’s had me thinking a lot about this. Now, I finally have a sort of article from the news station that was doing the broadcast.

Eddie’s Kids Founder Is Also A ‘Porn King’.

(CBS4) DENVER A Denver entrepreneur who gives lots of money to children through a charity called Eddie’s Kids is soon going to be spending time in jail.

Eddie’s Kids is special foundation for underprivileged children that provides free tickets to pro sporting events in the Denver area and the man behind it is Eddie Wedelstedt, one of the kings of pornography in America.

A very enthusiastic bunch of fans can usually be found at Denver Nuggets games at the Pepsi Center, courtesy of Eddie’s Kids. The children are given a chance to experience something new, and they get to bring family members along.

In what might like a contradiction to some, Eddie Wedelstedt’s company, Goalie Entertainment, distributes X-rated DVDs and other material. He also has now admitted to distributing an obscene video and conspiring with employees to cheat the government out of some $140,000 in tax money from his adult video arcades. Wedelstedt is looking at prison time for the crimes.

“Mr . Wedelstedt claims that he is the largest distributor of adult bookstore items in the nation,” IRS representative John Harrison said.

Goalie Entertainment rents, sells and distributes pornography DVDs across America.

From its headquarters in a non-descript building on Colorado Boulevard at Interstate 70 Wedelstedt’s company oversees approximately 60 adult stores, including several in the Denver area. Inside, on the hallway walls, Wedelstedt proudly displays thank you notes from Eddie’s Kids beneficiaries.

Wedelstedt’s said he does not see being in the pornography business and spearheading a children’s charity as a contradiction, but he said he is concerned about what the children will say when they see him go to prison.

“It worries me a lot; it worries and it scares me a lot because I don’t want them to be affected,” Wedelstedt said.

The Eddie’s Kids sponsor book is filled with ads from many of the best known names in the pornography industry, along with thank yous from a church youth group, schools the Anschutz Entertainment Group and Kroenke Sports.

“We just want to give from the kindness of our hearts, be able to give back to the community without being slighted,” he said.

Tax returns from Wedelstedt’s foundation that CBS4 obtained showed donations of $500,000 in 2003 to various children’s programs, including the Colorado Christian Home, known as the Tennyson Center for Children.

Bob Cooper, CEO of the Tennyson Center, said the money has helped, but that they are no longer accepting pornography-related money.

Cooper justified his struggle on the issue with a quote from the Rev. Billy Graham:

“The devil’s had that money long enough — it’s time for the lord to take over and do some good.”

Wedelstedt is expected to be going to prison for 13 months plus forfeit six adult stores in Texas, where he was indicted, but he promises to keep his charity alive.

“When I go to prison, which I’ve been been sentenced to, if I had to sell out or if I had to get out of the business, one thing I made a very serious committment to (is) I will never stop taking care of the kids,” Wedelstedt said.

(© MMVI CBS Television Stations, Inc. All Rights Reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.)

I’m not seeing a contradiction here. Where is it? Is it over there, with the big-time videogame console manufacturer giving money to some thing that’s trying to combat obesity in children? Or how about…maybe it’s with the pet lovers who give money to PeTA.

No, neither of those work. One’s just a writeoff, and possibly a bid for attention — not a contradiction, not a ‘conflict of interest’, or whatever the term is — just a company offloading some of it’s money somewhere where it might do something instead of…whatever our tax dollars do.

The other’s just a pet lover that doesn’t read the fine print. Give to your local shelter – the no-killier, the better. Please.

As for Mr. Porn King sending poor kids to sporting events? There’s plenty more he could do with that money, even if it’s all about the children. There’s childhood illnesses that need studying, and kids that aren’t just poor but parentless in some form or another that could use a little help too.

I guess there’s a bit of a problem there, though. A lot of places won’t accept all that dirty porn money.

I just went looking, and found an article that mentioned that Americans spend something like $10 BILLION a year on porn. I suppose I’d have to figure out how much money actually existed in the country, and there’d probably be some math that goes way over my head…but I’m guessing that even my money may’ve seen a porn transaction or two before it became mine.

I know that’s a silly concept, considering how little actual cash I see these days [I don’t carry cash; there’s very little chance of ever getting it back if you’re robbed], but electronic funds still count, in this kooky world of ‘oh, the money’s dirty because someone bought SEXY THINGS WITH IT!

At least, in my book they do. Watch out, you might be looking at a couple of bytes that were previously involved in porn right now.

And if you take that sort of shit seriously — get over it.

Ten billion a year into the porn industry. All our money is probably dirty. So, what’re we gonna do about it? Burn it?

I, personally, don’t care. If you don’t want your dirty porn money, you can send it to me. I’ll take it. I’ll deal with the unholy taint somehow….

Nobody else should care, either, least of all charities that need money and rely on donations. There is no moral or ethical issue here — it’s a donation. If you’re worried about appearances, you should probably take the time to trace the money all the way back to when it first came out of whatever printing press gave birth to it — there might be porn somewhere in its history. There might be a stripper, or…even a prostitute!

Dirty!

Here’s another idea — if your charity, whatever it may be, is in a position to turn away money based on the source, stop asking for money from me. You obviously have enough.