Some people probably know about Desperation, which happens on ABC Tuesday night at…well, tv.yahoo.com says it’s 7 for here — you’ll have to check your own listings, because I’m not going to do it for you.

This may be a bad thing for some people who do not have the ability to record two things at once — or watch one thing and record the other — as the season finale of House MD is also on Tuesday night, while Desperation is airing. This could easily be a conflict for some, but if you can’t record it, or can’t see either, then have someone record one of these things for you. Or just wait for the DVDs, it really doesn’t matter to me.

That’s not all the King happening this summer, however, as I found out yesterday when my most recent issue of Fangoria magically appeared in my mailbox in whatever way mail magically appears.

…what’s this you say about mailmen and postal services? I don’t believe you. That’s as silly as Jesus. Stop interrupting me, silly voices. Stop. NOW.

Where was I? Oh yes. Fangoria.

Far from being the ‘blood flick magazine’ I’ve heard it being accused of, it’s actually a wonderful…not quite monthly magazine that’s just overflowing with all the horror-genre information that I could probably get for free online if only I cared to stop being so lazy and google all the right terms. But that’s as likely to happen as me actually looking up your TV listings, so…I subscribe. And this is a good thing, because I get ‘exclusive’ articles, and I get to know about things I wouldn’t otherwise know about unless people like zed from chat told me….

This time, I had something to tell him!

See, this month’s issue didn’t just contain articles on The Descent, The O[hgodwhydidtheyremakeit]men, and [Yet Another]Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning. It had articles about some TV-based crap that we could all look forward to while suffering through yet another summer [thanks to global warming], where there are no more new episodes of our favourite shows.

For example: there is going to be a TV series made out of Blade, which seems to be ripe for jumping the shark at the very first episode, because Blade is played by a rapper that calls itself ‘Sticky Fingaz’. It will be Spike TV’s first original scripted show, and the first episode will air on June 28th, and then continue on Wednesdays starting July 5th.

But this is not Stephen King, so it is really just me being incapable of staying on topic. Back on topic with me, then….

Nightmares & Dreamscapes: From the Stories of Stephen King.

Thanks to the success of TNT’s remake of ‘Salem’s Lot…sometime this century…they [TNT, I assume] have gone back to the author and scored some short stories to turn into a sort of televised anthology [EDIT] which seems to be set to start airing this July, just like that other series I mentioned earlier.

Only five of the stories are actually from Nightmares & Dreamscapes. “You Know They Got a Hell of a Band” — Sort of like…”Children of the Corn”, but with bands instead of children and corn. Kinda. “The Fifth Quarter” — A story I don’t really remember. “Crouch End” — Which was published not just in Nightmares&Dreamscapes, but also in New Tales of the Cthulhu Mythos…and I haven’t reread the story since I discovered Lovecraft. “The End of the Whole Mess” — If this one is the one I think it is…ooh, fun! “Umney’s Last Case” — Another story I don’t remember, but that’s okay. This one is supposed to air first, commercial free.

There are three others — two from Everything’s Eventual: “The Road Virus Heads North” and “Autopsy Room Four.” The former is a strange story about a painting that changes, the latter could have some nice gore in it, if I remember the story correctly.

The other story they went way back into the good old days for — “Battleground,” from Night Shift. Fun little story, and I hope the network censors don’t get all strange over the idea of a tiny nuclear device….

Someone being interviewed in the article comments about ‘eight high-quality hours’. Hopefully, their opinion of ‘high quality’ is at least similar to my opinion of ‘decent’.

Unfortunately, my repeated not-quite-readings of the article — which not only spans many pages, but continues somewhere on page 80-something — have not turned up an actual air-date yet. I hope to find out when this is going to happen sometime before it happens.

I also hope that we actually get TNT in HD soon, and that these shows will show up OnDemand, as I have a TNT OnDemand category.

Also on the way, though probably not this summer, is a remake of Creepshow, and I’ve heard rumours of a Creepshow 3, and much talk of Romero working with King — specifically in reference to From a Buick 8. There’s mention of Cell being made into a movie, which could be good [or bad], and IMDB lists both Black House and The Talisman, though they are oddly out of order, so I don’t know what to make of it.

Overall, it looks like there’s going to be a whole buttload of Stephen King hitting screens of some sort, starting very soon. Hopefully, this is a good thing.

Not that I’m known for being optimistic about such things, but…it’s Stephen King. And, hey, I was kinda okay with the remake of The Shining. At least it followed the original story — and sometimes, that’s all that matters to me.