A couple of days ago, we made an emergency store run [walk, actually, and if you ever get the urge to rush off to the store while you’re on crutches? Don’t. I’m still hurting.] for catfood, and we were over in the prepackaged meats/bacon/hotdog area when I noticed something that was absolutely amazing to me.

A bag of mixed nuts.

I guess it’s that time of year again, where you put the nuts out in the display bowls with the nutcrackers and those little dental pick things for guests to hurt themselves on in a non-actionable way while seeking nutty snackiness. Somewhere, deep down, I knew it was that time of year every year it rolled ’round, but I never expected to see this particular bag of mixed nuts.

Certainly not a bag of mixed nuts containing Brazil Nuts like the bag I’ve been snacking out of [and regularly hurting myself with] over the last couple of days.

I actually thought, in a less deep place than the biological ‘time of year’ clock, that Brazil Nuts would’ve been pulled from the market — indeed, willfully forced into extinction entirely — because of how terribly Un-PC they are.

See, when I was growing up, I had at least one relative who told me that they were called nigger toes.

I figured that was enough for even the Save the Planet types to agree that something needed a good and proper extincting.

I think I might save a brazil nut in a little collectors box, just in case this does come to pass….