While I’m still technically a nonsmoker, I have, over the past six months, had more than a few cigarettes.

I’ve got some…pretty serious anxiety issues. And a bit of an aversion to pharmacologically-induced zombism, which means I’m more than hesitant to try anything a doctor would recommend. Because, really, I can’t imagine that the out-of-control panic feeling could possibly be made better by anything that would make me feel even less in control of who I really am.

So, I turned to the occasional cigarette. And, wouldn’t you know it, those evil little tubes bring something other than dire warnings of ‘worse than heroin’ addiction and slow, lingering social and literal death from the pneumonia you developed after being banished to the special smoking booth that just happens to be located under twenty feet of water in the underground, unheated pool….

Just a little bit, and I’d be able to get the shaking under control. It would force me to control my breathing, too, which isn’t easy. And, sure, smoking would make me a little angry, but that comes with the ‘nice, orderly thought process’ benefit, and beats the living hell out of panic.

Once or twice, they even helped with minor headaches.

But, it was smoking. And smoking is bad. And something I couldn’t ever allow myself to get comfortable with, even while supporting the rights of others to smoke.

…except, I’ve found an alternative. A nice, modern alternative. Electronic cigarettes.

They have flavours. And options. Oh, the options they have. Options that you can no longer find in the regular smoking world, unless you spend thirty to fifty on a box of nicoderm. But they don’t…really count, now do they?

For example — I can get zero nicotine chocolate liquid, fill a cartridge with it, and have the activity without the nicotine if I want to. And I just might. But, if I don’t, I can get a low or medium level fluid, and have the flavour, but with nicotine. But not nearly as much as I’d likely be getting if I were smoking a real ‘organic’ cigarette — as Gremlin’s calling them.

…and, aside from the initial expense — which is about the cost of a carton in most states, these days — it’s cheap. It might even be cheaper than my rather excessive Coke habit. And I’m talking about the cola variety, here.

All I can really hope for is that they don’t suddenly tax and regulate this into ultra-expensive hell. They probably will, but I’m sure it’ll take a while. They have to move at the speed of government, after all, even if they do decide to fake a bunch of science….

Hey. Maybe they’ll get so focused on this, they’ll leave your sweet and caffeinated drinks alone for another couple of years….

If you’re curious about this — maybe interested in trying it out, I can recommend the JOYE 510 — also called the Titan, and about a thousand other names. And I can recommend Midwest Vapor and E-SmokeyTreats. There’s also BluCigs, which…I can’t quite recommend yet, as much as I’d like to.

The 510 is a nice little model — and, understand, I’m saying this as someone who’s never tried anything else. It’s a little longer than a 100, and probably a little thicker. Definitely heavier. And it’s manually controlled — there’s a button on the battery that lights up the LED [mine’s blue; Gremlin has a red one] and turns on the atomiser. The atomiser heats up the liquid in the cartridge, [a little plastic thing with…y’know those fishtank things? Fluval make them? Kinda looks like that. Like cotton, but…not. That soaks up the liquid, and it just sits there.] making steam, which you inhale. Just like a cigarette. Except without the extra chemicals, including that new ‘fire safe’ stuff. The liquid’s just Propylene Glycol or Vegetable Glycerine [PG or VG], nicotine in a level of your choosing, and flavouring [I think it’s usually candy oils, or something like that]. You can buy pre-filled cartridges for whatever model you have, or, in some cases, buy blanks to fill with ‘nicquid’ of your choosing.

There are, obviously, risks. Nicotine is a poison, and, if you use too much, you’ll get sick. Just like if you smoke too many cigarettes — more than you usually do, that is. And, if you get any of the liquid on your skin, you should at least wipe it off, if not wash it off. It can be an irritant. And I guess you also run the risk of getting a flavour you don’t like, but that can sometimes be avoided by either ordering a cheap batch of prefilled carts, or by ordering a ‘taster’ or ‘sample’, which are sometimes offered at places dealing exclusively in ‘nicquid’.

You can make your own flavours, though, by getting the right ingredients. And there are communities online with people doing just that. The BluCigForum is really the only one that I can personally recommend. Some of the others might not be as welcoming or friendly….

That’s really all I have right now. I’ll probably be able to say more later, when I’ve tried more flavours, or had an incredibly positive or negative experience with some company or group of people….